I'm not really experienced with dating...and have never been a fan of online dating either...but I met this guy on the site...talked on the phone every night for about 2 weeks, and met up about a week ago...had lunch and then watched a movie...everything went pretty smoothly, and naturally....We're still talking on the phone a lot..he'd call me almost every night...and most of the time we have random conversations just about anything...

Now, I'm not sure if he's just talking to me so much because he's bored...or if he's interested in me...I really dont know..at the same time, i dont know if i have feelings for him either..i know i really like him and am really comfortable with him as a friend, at least..

My question is..are we just gonna be friends? I don't want to be on the phone with him every night if we're just going to be friends..becuase I know eventually i'd be more attached to him if i talk to him that much..what should I do? should i just continue talking to him, without know what he wants and just let things be?

ASK HIM .

How about just asking him and see how he feels?

Ask him, but do it face to face.

talk to him...find out how he feels.

at one point i was really close to asking him.."why do you call me every night"..
but i didn't becuase i didn't want to "ruin" things...

Not enough information.


Don't ask him. It'll ruin everything.

ASK OR YOU WILL NEVER KNOW

nothing is wrong for a guy to call every nite.. he just wants to see how your doing and how your day went.... you got to get used to it

that's what i am afraid of...."ruining" everything...even though I am not sure what's there to ruin..

I don't know how it's like to really like a person..in the past i always felt sort of nervous talking to the guys i liked...but with him, it's just so comfortable i feel like i'm talking to a good friend..so idk...

Asking him explicitly is going to ruin everything. If he isn't going to make a move in a week, you need to pull away from him to see what he'll do.

Ask or FOREVER wonder

how do I pull away from him? like not answer his calls?

I wouldn't ask just yet...
if you enjoy his company just give it time
don't let yourself get too wrapped up in it
and take it for what it is
you will get a sense of it if he has feelings for you
and right now his actions are speaking louder than words.

jmho.

I'll advise against playing games...just sayin'

yeah...actually..as much as most of the ppl replied to my post suggested me to "just ask him," i am more leaning towards not asking him...i dont want to take the "initiative" and risk ruining things...

it's just that i'm really afraid of getting hurt in the end..so part of me tells myself to pull away from him before it's too late..

Just relax and be you. Don't worry about ruining things. If the guy wants you, it will be because of who you are.

Just think in your mind... do you really want to spend your life with someone who is wishy-washy and slow to take action?

If the answer is no, then just convince yourself that he's not what you want. This will be easier for you when he starts complaining that you don't like him anymore. He's kinda right, but he lost his chance, ya know? It isn't like you didn't give him a chance.

If he's not what you want, treat him like every other friend you have. Shorten the length of the phone calls. Be "too busy tomorrow" to talk to him and talk to him every other day... try to ween him off.

In order to be lovers of any substance or quality you must first be friends (personal belief). It's only been a few weeks, right? Relax. Take a breather. It seems to me you are letting your personal fears override your good judgment here.

Communication is huge in any relationship and talking to him is definitely going to play an important role here. Just make sure that you are asking him for the right reasons (knowledge) and not asking him for the wrong ones (to get him to comfort your own unwarranted fears).

Why should he be willing to put it on the line if you aren't as willing?

While i don't suggest driving him over, in a truck with a bummer sticker saying "LOVE ME 4EVER", i do suggest it's time to find out the answer. You have already decided you would like to pursue this to some degree, so why not pursue it?

Let's play the odds, you gamble-
Worst case scenario - he gets uncomfortable and ends any relationship you had. Well to be honest if you start pushing him away that's the end result anyway.
Best case scenario - you are happy FOREVER.

Games are overrated. Opportunities lost while people try to read other peoples minds.. don't lose yours. Just another point of view to consider.

Best of luck