1. Skippy heartbeat when you think of him/her.

You think it's: Love
Medical possibility: Tachycardia which may lead to ventricular fibrillation and myocardial infarction (heart attack)



2. Restless trembling of hands, feet and other body parts.

You think it's: Love
Medical possibility: Parkinson's Disease



3. Constant smiling.

You think it's: Love
Medical possibility: Bell's Palsy



4. Absent mindedness, forgetfulness, inability to focus on tasks at work or home.

You think it's: Love
Medical possibility: early onset Alzheimer's Disease



5. Frequent or constant sexual arousal.

You think it's: Love
Medical possibility: nymphomania



6. Weakening of knees and bursts of energy when he/she calls or comes over.

You think it's: Love
Medical possibility: multiple sclerosis



7. Inability to stop thinking about him/her.

You think it's: Love
Medical possibility: OCD



8. Bruising on neck, breasts and other tender areas.

You think it's: Love
Medical possibility: leukemia



9. Insomnia.

You think it's: Love
Medical possibility: benign prostatic hyperplasia



10. Feeling that you can smell/hear/feel him or her when not in his/her presence.

You think it's: Love
Medical possibility: schizophrenia

Now I know how to explain it all away! Should it ever happen again, that is.

That clears things up! Now it's not love, it's hypochondria!