On The Outside Looking In

On the outside looking in
Reminded how it was back then.
Sanity the road not taken.
How bad I was still shaking.

I thought I had tried it all.
It was long before the fall.
I hadn't given up just, yet.
Sank in the snow cold and wet.

Laughing in a hysterical fit.
Well this ought to do it.
Sitting in the snow in despair.
A friend had taken me there.

I say a friend; Didn't know him.
Found that he was just like them.
Like me they had made the trip.
Grabbed my coat; It didn't rip.

Led me through the closed door.
I hadn't ever been there before.
I didn't know what to expect.
My life had became a real wreck.

I can still see that door, today.
Glad I followed their new way.
It was new to me; But old I guess.
How everything was a total mess.

Opening the door without knocking.
At first even that was shocking.
Today, I do it all the time.
Then though I was just a mime.

On the outside looking in
I see the faces of friends.
How I see things has changed.
Different from that one deranged.

Worlds In the Vortex

Quick to judge but slow to anger.
The rage to me is not a stranger.
Slow to judge but fast to anger.
The thought process is a rearranger.

Sliding through the worlds, again.
The transmitter being a real friend.
It takes me through worlds, unknown.
Each world looks almost like home.

Minute differences at first then greater.
So much has changed; Especially the creator.
Caught up in a vortex; I search for home.
My friends keep me from being alone.

I meet new friends and rank strangers.
The present peace and unknown danger.
Wondering what each new world will show.
It challenges my beliefs and what I know.

At the present course which takes me there.
I wonder where I am and how big is where.
The trip seems so long and do I circle?
It makes me wonder about the color purple.

So many colors I encounter along the way.
Some of the colors of gray with me stay.
Other colors I learn to be brand new.
But they all seem to be pretty, too.

Life Under Reconstruction

The day that you went and died
All I did for years is cried.
All that was beautiful was gone.
The days and nights were so long.

I neglected the home and pets.
Thought of all my little regrets.
There was no comfort inside.
I lost you; I lost my pride.

Nothing mattered and I didn't care.
Yet, I searched for you everywhere.
Found others who suffered like me.
Friends they became like family.

They helped to clean the rooms.
I even bought more big brooms.
I dusted and took out more trash.
Found pictures and your old stash.

Bagged up memories of us together.
Hauled off things that you treasured.
A friend came to help me paint anew.
Just like you always helped me to do.

Awesome as always great writes

Thank you, friend.

When Insanity Leaves

I blamed you and the rage burnt.
I blamed myself and guilt hurt.
I gave up blaming and accepted.
Then my love was resurrected.

Every time I pointed a finger
It became like a little stinger.
Found a way to lose the poison.
I just accepted it as poison.

Don't need it; I thought I did.
Was so nice when it was all rid.
It brought me back to sanity
And my favorite friend, Serenity.

What a comfort to let it just go.
Where it went; I don't want to know.
Cause when I find it; It starts, again.
And I would rather just have a friend.

Thanks for letting me share insanity.
I hope it can help you instantly.
When insanity leaves; It feels good.
And I feel less like a piece of wood.

Those Times I Shared With You

Those times I shared with you.
The crazy things we would do.
To chat like fools in wee hours.
Running in those rain showers.
They thought we were so crazy.
Then I picked you that daisy.
You held it like it was a rose.
Drenched us from head to toes.

My Darling Must Be A Freak

My darling must be a freak.
For who else could accept me?
Normal is not what I seek.
For normal is too easy to be.

My darling must be a fool.
For who else would stay around?
The wise have went to school.
So many smart ones to be found.

My darling must be a concept.
For could she really exist?
Her I just can't intercept.
But still I try to persist.

My darling must be an ideal.
For haven't I searched long?
Only my darling could feel.
I heard about her in a song.

My darling must be a lost soul.
For who else would come to be?
Only my darling would know.
For only she believes in me.

Thank you, friends.

Twin Vipers

Twin vipers coiled around a stick.
Twin vipers that can make me sick.
Twin vipers that can always bite.
Twin vipers visible in my sight.

Ying and Yang guiding me along.
Mortal combat from dusk to dawn.
Each one giving me their choices.
Sometimes no escape from the voices.

The rage of voices in my mind.
Sometimes they can be so unkind.
To hear one is to hear the other.
Caught in the middle; I discover.

Fangs so sharp; They scare me.
I hear my own voice but barely.
Their bites are deadly poison.
But it is the life I have chosen.

I am glad they bite themselves.
I don't want any of their hell.
It is good that we can coexist.
Because I know they will persist.

The Survivor's Guide To Hell

She taught me how not to be sad.
The insanity was making me mad.
My friend gave me my first tool.
She was a survivor so it was cool.

In the darkness she showed light.
She didn't let give up on the fight.
She let me know I had a choice.
She helped me to find my voice.

Hers was the first voice of reason.
She explained to me people pleasing.
She showed me how I went astray.
How I remember her that one day.

I was so lost in abyss and hell.
How I got there I couldn't tell.
Guilt, rage and my blinded sight.
She brought it all to the light.

She put me back on the right path.
Slowly she helped me with my wrath.
Made me aware of bondage of self.
She was such a gifted and wise Elf.

Now I can walk through hell alone.
I can read the signs as I walk on.
I just needed that guide long ago.
To help me with my fractured ego.

From Masochism To Martyrdom

She just wanted to have some fun.
Said she wasn't hurting no one.
But its a fine line she walks I know.
For shes out to try to save a soul.

I have tried to help her all that I can.
But I am afraid she doesn't understand.
She thinks he will come around in time.
And that he will straighten and do fine.

In the meantime she is in jeopardy.
If only if she could only just see.
But she is too busy saving him.
Unselfishly to her its about them.

Sooner or later she might just get it.
Depending if her love is indefinite.
How much can she take does she know?
How long before she will just let it go?

Her friends try to understand her, again.
They don't see what she does in that man.
Her life is in turmoil and she has none.
On the road from masochism to martyrdom.

A Friend In The Night

That wonderful feeling you gave me last night.
Made me think everything would be alright.
Wasn't really anything you really said or did.
Was more about how you made feel like a kid.

A feeling acceptance I hadn't felt for a while.
Brought on by your laughter and your smile.
You laughed at my jokes and I felt a glow.
Some how you made me feel all mellow.

For a time it was just you and me, friend.
Carrying on like the night wouldn't end.
A little fantasy came to my dreary world.
Forgot how it was like to have a special girl.

Though we will never be more than friends.
And the relationship was like just pretends.
You touched me in a way that was nice.
Melted away this persona like hard ice.

Even though to you it might be nothing.
To me its really a treasure and something.
A memory of a time that we had fun.
And we didn't have to share it with anyone.

Applause applause applause!!!!

Thank you.

The Servant Of Love

I can feel the need like you.
Helping is a little thing I do.
After the job is all done
It helps to help someone.

Because they won't ever ask
And it is just a small task.
The reward is yours to keep.
It helps them when they sleep.

It lets them know we care.
They aren't going any where.
And after you get to go away.
They have to wait and stay.

Can't help the way they are.
They come from near and far.
Just a little of your company.
They know that you are busy.

But this little thing you do;
It will all come back to you.
It isn't something done in vain.
After its done love will remain.

Beyond The Veil

Wilted flowers in a vase beyond the veil.
In a centerpiece on table tell a tale.
Of a bygone time which is shadowed now.
By dust and cobwebs but enchanted somehow.

In a mansion long neglected and torn down.
They used to thrive and from live ground.
The ground was discarded for not needed.
Useful for when the flowers were seeded.

Hand-picked flowers that seem now bereft.
Were placed by a gentle hand that was deft.
Gathered by a young maiden on a hillside.
That adorned her table like a sign of pride.

A trophy to her she did imagined it to be.
That she once shared with her whole family.
Traces of her are no where to be found.
Like the discarded mansion and the ground.

But her memory lives on a shadowed hill.
The land remembers when she picked still.
It was there long before her or her tale.
It smiles hidden there beyond the veil.

beautiful

Thank you. I hope you are having a nice day.