It is... I mean I'm not fake at all on here the joking and flirting and tough cookie attitude you see is how I really am but this serious sensitive side I don't let a lot of people see because I don't want anyone to know how vulnerable I am. I have to have a tough exterior and my past is the reason for it...

Awww Ali my sweet....thank you for letting us see...it means a lot.....

I know people are going to read.....and I think a lot of Wow's will happen...and your right woody a lot of goofy which is great...but I want to know the people....this I truly feel is what makes the Matchmaking Game so special also...because we have formed some amazing friendships...

You know how I feel about things!!

dont worry, i know you're not fake. like you, my heart carries burdens and scars. after my 1st ex, i took a long time to open up. signing up here and this past summer helped me to open up more.

Just led to ask both rare and ali......Do you guys think because of your past.....that you have learned and let it go....or do you feel you bring the past into the future? and if so do you think a good or bad idea?

Well my past does effect my relationships with all men romantically, family and friends... I hate the fact that it does but I can't help it. When nothing but horrible things happen to you your whole entire life due to men it's hard to let it go..... I'm trying my hardest every day to let it go but something always comes back and reminds me and my wall just goes right back up...

Although your past is just that, the past, it is also your future. We are who we are from what we have experienced and who we have met. It tells us what we want and what we do not want. What to do and what not to do. Without a past, we are empty.

So many... how to pick just one?

I know this is probably not the answer folks might think I would come up with, but... The day I married my now ex-wife was one of the most spectacular days I have ever lived. I thought for once and for all my eternal loneliness was going to be gone. I dressed in a tux, her in a gorgeous gown, my teo oldest friends standing up with me. I got married (on purpose) at the same church my parents got married at in my smallhome town in Michigan. We traveled up from North Carolina with all the kids and bride's maids. I was walking on air the whole day.


Then, the complete opposite... the worst day of my entire life was June 22nd, 2002. I learned that day that my wife had taken all of out savings, both checking accounts, our safety deposit box, and all of the rental business money... OUT of the bank. When I came home, she stirred up a domestic thing, and had her two sons beat the living hell out of me. I was in the emergency room for 6 hours getting treated.


She had cheated on me for 4 years with the man she knew just before her and I had met. She stole everything I owned. All of my life's savings for all time was in that bank account. I left the marriage a pauper. No judge ever did a thing about it.


Then Oont the caveman threw his club in the Grand River and decided not to date ever again.

That was 6 years ago....

o0o0o Love I am so sorry that is horrible

^^^ what he said !!!!!!

AMEN brother woody!!!

^^^ what he said !!!!!!

AMEN brother woody!!!

Thanks guys for all the honest and heartfelt answers...


This is my take on it....Your past is called that for a reason.....imo you learn from it and then let it go...sometimes that is not always easy to do...but so imperative so those walls don't go up....And then once the walls go down...don't let them go back up..sometimes I tell people one brick at a time..just one brick....

There is no doubt that so many have past hurts but I just can't get myself to dwell on it...I would rather move forward and look at the light at the end of the tunnel instead of buried to my neck in pity and oh wo is me....and I know might sound harsh...


But it's



"In Your Face"

One shall never forget the past. It may be buried deep within, but it is always there. It is a part of the fiber that is us.

Deb it's not harsh at all. I understand the past is the past and I try to forget it but the constant reminders makes it hard for me. I do try though.

You are the female version of me.

My life has been one hellish nightmare after another. Especially with the women I've been with. Not one... not one has ever been faithful to me. I don't trust anybody now.

The memories are permanently scared into my long term brain module thing... you can't go in there and scrape the gunk out. Just learn to deal with it.

With that, I am saying goodnight, my dear friends! You are all in my thoughts and prayers!! See you all tomorrow and pleasant dreams to you!

And (((DEB))), what can I say?? You're the best! No flirt there, just honesty!

I know you do darling...and I know as hard as all get up....but there is a reason it is called the past....and woody your right it's all part of the fiber that makes you.....you....but when you have the past as a crutch...it just sucks...and you can't really go toward where your supposed to me...don't let it hold you back and put in proper perspective.

Awwww woody darling I heart you so major...sleep good....



and I am right behind woody......so your in charge ali darling...I love you guys and thanks for the great question and answers...




TOMORROW SUBJECT:


The lame e-mails we get and the loosers the deliver them?



look up yea I did say that.....might word different when I am not so tired...




(((((((Ali))))))) love you doll




((((((TM))))))))) you are my heart BFF

And thanks for the "match"!!!!

the past do teach us some things. i am not as naieve as i once was. my sensory can be out of whack yet can be on target at the same time. it taught me also consider all possible options