I am just typing, so if I seem alittle confused that is because I am. I am just venting, and if you don't want to relied that okay, maybe typing will help. Anyway, I can't get the situation out of my mine, and it hurts so bad. Co-worker calls in sick all the time at work, and funny thing is, my ex is taking a vacation this week. She came in late yesterday morning, and she didn't come in at all today, I know they are together. And, I know it shouldn't bother me. But, it does, it hurts so bad. It is really driving me crazy, I know there is nothing I can do about it. But, I keep thinking, how I just fell for their "so call playing", they were playing right and front of me, and I was fool est enough, not to think nothing of it. I feel like a complete fool for being so native. It tough to act happy, and I try that and I will continue to do that to keep my job. My ex has done nothing wrong, but get on with his life, and he has chosen who he wants to be with. I know he is having the time of his life, while I sitting here feeling sorry for myself. People say get out and do something, well, I can go out, and still think about it. Nothing takes my mind off of it. I had a good cry tonight. I was listening to the radio song, and his favorite group came on, and I just set there and cried. And, no it didn't make me feel any better. I don't know who to get out of this hold I am in, and I can honesty say that I am trying. But, in the end, they are still together, and I am all alone. My heart feels so heavy and all my feeling are on my shoulders, I am easily upset, and everything reminds me of him. I thinking why is he on vacation this week. It not normal for him to take a vacation around this time of year. Why do I care. Why can't I just accept he not coming back to me. Why do I wish it was him everytime the phone rings at home or work. I know it sounds like I am in self pity, well I know I am, and I also know there is alot of people out there alot worest off than me. But, he is a good man, and I have notice changes in him, since he and her been going out, like lying, he never used to do that. Why does he think he has too now. I am disappointed that is. Honesty is high priority to him and me. She is changing him, or he going for the bite. Of course, she probley got him wrap around her little finger, I never thought anyone could do that. I just want to quit hurting, and wondering what they are doing, I want to be content in my life. I been getting counseling, and on medications, but all the couseling and medications won't work until I ready for them too. I know I am hopeless. I could type more, but I quit for now. Thank you for reading this if you did.

I know it is tough as I have been there. You answered all your own questions. It is all up to you. You will know when you are ready to move on. When your are ready, you'll go, and go quickly. Not everyone can move on quickly or let go easily. Some find another person right away because that is their way of coping. We each have our own way, our own grieving time that we need, then we can move forward. We broke up almost a year ago and I finally decided I wasn't wasting anymore energy on what "might have been" and what I have no control over. It was a decision I made when I was ready! You'll get there. It is harder when you work in the same place and if you have the option of finding something different it might help. Do what is best for you! Doesn't sound like (no matter how great he is) that he is the best for you...which means there is someone else that IS.

Good luck to you!!