Topic: 10. Doctor , Doctor | |
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A man went to his doctor to find out why he had been having such severe headaches. The doctor ran some tests and after a few hours called the man into his office. "I have terrible news," he told the patient. "Your condition is terminal." "Oh no!" the man wailed. "How long do I have?" "Ten ..." began the doctor. "Ten what?" the patient interrupted. "Days? Months? Years?" "Nine," said the doctor, "eight, seven, six, ..."
DOCTOR: Well, Mr Jones, I can't find anything wrong with you. It must be the drink. MR JONES: Okay, Doctor, I'll come back in the morning when you're sober. 'Doctor, :doctor, I think I must be invisible. Everyone ignores me.' 'Next, please.' DOCTOR" The pain in your right leg is caused by old age. OLD MAN : But my left leg is the same age and that doesn't hurt. Doctor, Doctor, I keep seeing pink elephants. Have you seen a psychiatrist? No - only pink elephants. Doctor, doctor, I keep seeing into the future. When did this first happen? Next Tuesday. Doctor, doctor, I keep losing my memory. When did you first notice it? When did I first notice what? Doctor, Doctor, I keep thinking that I'm a bridge. Now then, what's come over you? Two cars and a truck. Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a pack of cards. Sit down and I'll deal with you later. Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress, and I keep losing my temper with people. Doctor: Tell me about your problem. Patient: I JUST DID, DIDN'T I, YOU STUPID IDIOT! |
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