A friend of mine called me this evening BAWLING her eyes out. Her baby was taken by DCF a few weeks ago because of an altercation she had had with her boyfriend at the time. Well aparently she met with DCF today, and the deal they had worked out last week was that she had to have a 1br apartment and a full time job in 6 months, currently she is living with a friend. She had a job as a live in nanny for the friend of hers, and today DCF made her quit that, appointed her a new social worker, AND changed her time to 3 months and a 2br apartment or they will take the child for good. Is there any way that she can go to a judge and appeal their decision or anything? It's really tough in VT right now to find jobs and housing and they just cut that by 50%, seems kind of ridiculous to me. I don't know if anyone has any insight on this, but any would be appreciated. Thanks =)

Does she have a lawyer? That should probably be her first step. But from reading about her situation, that probably isn't financially feasable. Do you have any lawyers who do pro bono work in VT? She can check with the court house they may have the names of some lawyers who can represent her. Good luck to your friend. And I'm impressed that you care enough about her to seek out suggestions for her.

I know there is a law group up here that will do certain cases that deal with DCF for free, something I'll get her looking into

she better have her own lawyer, as a court appont lawyer wont do squat
and what was the reason she lost her child. and im sure if she talks to the judge even with the head case worker something can be worked out] and sense she workd as a nanny what was wrong with that.(it was a job)

I don't know what the laws are in VT, but in PA a same sex parent can share a BR with a child, but if you have a child of a different sex they can require you to have a room for you and the child. I would definitely get a lawyer, though.

The whole nanny thing, I'm still trying to figure out lol, doesn't make sense. I'm not willing to give out why she lost the child, it's nothing big tho.

Yeah the child's a boy, so that makes a little more sense in that light. Allright, thanks for the help =)

the child if its a boy has to have its own room when he turns 1yrs old. thats according to housing

so if there is 2 children boy and girl they have to have there own room

In most states, that law about a seperate room by a certain age for opposite sex, is not a law, but a "housing code". It is ONLY enforceable inside rental units and such (just to throw that tidbit out there).
As far as everything tht has happened though, and reading betweent he lines with when the child was removed and everything, I would say he was removed because the boyfriend was a danger, and they werent sure that mom would keep him away. Which is why they told her she had to have her own place (away from boyfriend) and a job.
Again I dont know about your state, but most places, dcs can NOT take a child away for lack on income, as there is welfare and food stamps available etc. NOR can they just arbitrarily tell you waht job you can and can not have (as long as it is legal lol). They also can not require you to live on your own with no roomate.
If all this is actually what is happening, I would definitely be talking with a lawyer, and doing everything I could to get my child back.

I have dealt with dcs before several times, what with being a singel father by divorce with sole custody and all. Last year I had a case worker straight out of college thought he wa going to use me as a way to make a name for himself; he did all right. his name and reputation is so big that he lost his job with social services, and last I heard was under investigatio by the county or the state, for abuse, harrasment and wrongful removal of children from their homes.

In my case, he showed up while I wa at a funeral and my kids were with their uncle. the kids mother was at the house visiting, but court orders state I have to b present for all visitation. He (the worker) shoved past my ex-wife to walk throughmy house, gave her the third
degree about why she lost custody, and where I was, and then threatened her and me through her with removal of my children cause the sink was "full of dishes".
When I got home, I rang his supervisor up, chewed him a new ass, then called the worker up, ripped HIM a new ass, told him to call his supervisor, who proceeded to rip him another new ass, and tell him when the appointment was that I set up for him to come back and talk with me in person. I also told him exactly what dishes were in the sink down to the number of forks (four plates, four forks, and four cups; frying pan and spatula).
three months later, he brought two cops with him, pulled me out of the house and had his buddies keep me outside (no warrant or naything) while he and another cop went through the house. Threatened to take my children away again. This time I called not only his superviosr, but the director as well, and the da's office. A month later he had been transferred 200 miles away, and a month after that he was on suspension pending investigation.
So as you can see, sometimes you have to stand up and do something (legal wise) to prevent from being victimized. I would not reccomend ripping anyone a new ass like I did, but I was still upset from the funeral when my ex fell into my arms balling about the whole episode (and keep i mind she is suicidal).

but definitely, get a lawyer, and not a court lawyer either as someone else mentioned. it osunds to me like she ahs a harrasment suit at the minimum, and any decent lawyer will take a percentage out of any winnings, instead of payment up front.

At what age do they require the opposite sex child to have their own room?

I wouldn't think that it's an issue from birth to maybe 6 yrs. old or so.

Most homes, after the child is one year old or more.

Yes, your friend needs an attorney. First place to start is your state's bar association, they almost always have lists of people/firms that they can refer her to. I don't know about your state, but in VA, social services cannot just arbitrarily remove children from homes, unless they are in imminent danger. And, even then, it's a temporary removal pending a court hearing which needs to be held within 72 hours of the child's removal. The goal of all social services is to return the children to their parents as soon as possible. They give the parent(s) ample opportunity to correct whatever the problem is before removal.

I'd hazard a guess you don't have all the details of this from your friend. I'd hazard another guess that this isn't her first run-in with social services and/or whatever was going on at that given moment was so hazardous to the child that they are probably doing your friend a favor in the long run. She needs legal help, now! And, she should work within the system as well, social services can help her find a job, find an adequate place to live, etc. They can help set her up with whatever public services are available to her. She should talk to them.

Also, here's a website that might get her on the path to some legal help.

http://www.vtlegalaid.org/

http://www.lsc.gov/map/lscprogramdirectory.asp

Good luck to your friend, it's a tough road she's got and my prayers are with her.

Hmmm...my child did it much longer.

I know couples that have had their 8 yrs. old show up in their bed on a stormy night.

My son slept with me until he was about 11 (not by MY choice)

My child slept with me until they were about 6 yrs. old.

My ex got my son in the habit when he was a baby and I'll tell you, it was hell breaking it. We tried everything. He finally just had to make the decision on his own, I guess.

My child (a baby) started sleeping with me when they got sick and I had to suction the nose clean all night. I got too tired to keep getting out of bed. The extra cute new comforter on the their bed helped my child make the decision to move.

Where is the sperm donor????

I have to agree someone is not telling you the whole story.

With caseworkers having upwards 250 cases they would not take this child and go through finding a foster home and so forth unless someone has reported the child was in imminent danger.

If she was a live in Nanny there was something going on. And there are probably more reasons than anyone is going to tell you because of confidentiality. My guess is she was a nanny for a sex offender or the employers kids are being abused or they wouldn't have ordered her to terminate her employment.

If someone reported that this child is being neglected or abused they have to take the child until they can prove otherwise. If it is not her first run in with DCF you can pretty well guess she has refused to co-operate with the system and probably failed a drug test and just doesn't want to tell you the real deal.

She is hoping she can get you to front her money for a two bedroom place and maybe even cough up a retainer for a lawyer for her. Chances are if she did flunked a drug test she is thinking, getting the kid back will keep her out of jail. It won't but if you co-sign a lease you could end up having to pay her rent even if she is jailed.

The court has already appointed an attorey adlietum for the child so it's interests are being protected.

You try to insert yourself in this problem you are highly likely to end up finding yourself in a situation where the Mother does something reallly stupid and you get charged as an accompliss. Your life could go down in flames really fast. I advise all due caution.

hire a azz lawyer

he it almost worked for OJ