Topic: How far is too far??? | |
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when it comes to LDR,it boils down to transition,who is going to move,blah, blah ,blah. all i can say is,me personally nope, aint worth it.
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I have picked up and followed a love interest in the vein that I married a military guy who was moved cross country several times so we basiclly took the kids, our stuff, and started from scratch several times. What I found is if you love someone then what the relationship offers sustains the majority of your needs and the other ones are filled in my personalities that you like but generally are repeated in every group. Every where I went I had a girlfriend that liked to shop, a job mentor, a peer Mom and so forth. Some actually became long term friends and showed up when casual friends wouldn't. I do remember being stunned by the mix of friends and family who made my soft place to land when my husband died soon after moving to a new place that I basiclly only casually new people. What I also found is most neighborhoods are alike more than they are different. You have to bloom where you are planted weather you live across the street from your child hood home or across the nation. Were I to find someone long distance I would test the relationship before I jumped ship and moved bag and baggage but I would never nail my feet to the floor that only has one pair of slippers under the bed if I had a reasonable expectation of finding someone who wanted two. I am sure that is probably because I have had a very good experience having a mate and I would like to repeat it. If all I had was some sembalence of peace in living alone I would probably stay alone.
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The Pros and Cons of Long Distance Dating
Pros: *I get the remote when ever I want *The toliet seat is alway down *If I don't feel like talking, I just don't answer the phone *I can eat cereal for dinner *I get my laundry done in two loads Cons: *Can't see him whenever I need to *I miss him all the time *He is not here to kiss goodnight *My arms feel empty all the time *Talking on the phone is not the same as face to face Little things that make a relationship real can be taken for granted. I for one would rather have a long distance relationship than none at all |
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Long distance relationships require perfection, as humans we are simply not perfect. Therefore most long distance relationships fail (not all, but most).
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Traditional dating is impossible with too much distance to gap. I don't imagine you can get to know someone well enough to move to them or ask them to move to you based on occasional get togethers and nightly phone calls. It's a formula for disaster if you ask me. Agreed. Three formulas, three disasters for me. Don't really see the point in a fourth one. I'll stay right here and oogle the girl in the grocery store. For some reason, she is unable to detect my presence. This happens to me a lot in grocery stores, though. Seems to be a malfunctioning cloaking device. |
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I always believed there were no limits on love... |
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Traditional dating is impossible with too much distance to gap. I don't imagine you can get to know someone well enough to move to them or ask them to move to you based on occasional get togethers and nightly phone calls. It's a formula for disaster if you ask me. I would agree it takes a concerted effort and verification of direct contact eventually but I am amazed at the people who get married and haven't ever discussed the basics like money, houseing, parents, siblings, careers, having children,pets, even sex, not to mention religion, ageing, or personal habits ect ect...OR what really knocks me out don't even like the person they are marrying. Anyone ever watched the show Bridezilla or the Nanny? Now that is some scarey stuff...lol. |
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Traditional dating is impossible with too much distance to gap. I don't imagine you can get to know someone well enough to move to them or ask them to move to you based on occasional get togethers and nightly phone calls. It's a formula for disaster if you ask me. Agreed. Three formulas, three disasters for me. Don't really see the point in a fourth one. I'll stay right here and oogle the girl in the grocery store. For some reason, she is unable to detect my presence. This happens to me a lot in grocery stores, though. Seems to be a malfunctioning cloaking device. Maybe she likes you but doesn't want the store manager to razz her about wasteing time because he is watching her register on closed circut TV. Give her a business card with your email on it. Then she can talk to you without and audience. |
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I always believed there were no limits on love... Ive read several times that there is no limit on love> that may be true but you can love someone in an impossible situation. Personally it really depends on my job hand house situation primarily my job. if i love my job im likely not going anywhere. if i am indifferent or i hate it and she wants t olive together then i would head out there. Ill be honest personally i want to see the woman i am with often. I want to be able to get out of work after having a bad day and feel her touch on my are, neck. I want to be able to say " ok lets go to Atlantic city or skiing. I guess that may be selfish but i am realizing more and more that distance is funny thing. you have to fit days/weeks/ months into a short span. things are prob great when you are together and not so great when you are apart. SO not too many people are saying how far they would go if they have a limit.... As of now i feel that the max for me is a 2 hour driving distance. and she better be my dream woman/the woman i will likely marry. |
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Recently, a friend of mine went to Ceylon!!!!!!!!
To meet the man she had found online. She spent about 6 wks there, then after she returned to U.S. he came to vist for 8 wks. They were married about 2 wks ago. She will spend another 3 months with him in Ceylon this winter, then the 2 of them return to live in the U.S. He lived in the U.S. before, when he went to college. They are both in their late fifties. How cool is that. |
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Give her a business card with your email on it. Then she can talk to you without and audience. I like that! All I have to do is make up some sort of reasonable facsimile of a business card! (Authors don't usually have business cards, as far as I know, but there's nothing at Office Max that says they can't. As far as I know!) |
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