This is a rough(very rough) jumble of thoughts......anyone have any ideas on how to flesh it out.


I doggedly climb the dark winding path
I see it stretch before me
Treacherous it does lie
Fraught with pain and woe
Pieces of my life
Black and twisting it curves
Narrow as can be
Steeply climbing ever so high
Boulders of deceit
I carefully must traverse
My hands a mass of cuts
As I trip and fall
My blood shines wet and red
Against obsidian shards of failure
That pit the path before me
The flashlight of hope i hold
Shines weakly from a lens massed with cracks
Cracks from slipping more times than not
From my bloody palms
I stubbornly push on
Every so often the path evens out
At these points I'm most afraid
I can hear the wolf of pain
Baying at my heals
He lunges from the side
I don't move quick enough
He bites taking a chunk of my soul
I cauterize my wound with bitterness
So that i don't bleed out
My body is a maze of cuts and bruises
I pull my robe of ice closer
Hiding the majority of my scars
My flashlight beam is weak
Hope growing dim
The path seems to loom
longer and longer before me
What keeps me going on?
The knowledge that at the end
You are there
There to melt me
There to heal me
There to make me whole

I like it just the way it is...very nice

i agree. it's great!

Awesome write

very well down

Heres some help along the path

Thanks guys...........I think?:)

Not really what i was looking for but I'm glad you like it.......i think it's to choppy tho can't quit get it to flow

What a piece I tell ya, this work is excellent, no struggling for words or trying to capture a feeling this is all you without a doubt, unmistakably daunting a painful life, but you have released it, and now we all can feel the hurt of your soul. Listen when you write from your heart there is no right or wrong, just spelling mistakes, and that's no biggy you did very well and viewers pulled this up to see what you've written so all in all, keep up the good writes.

Way to go..Ice, never stop believing in yourself!

Myself thought it had just the right flow and the meaning is very deep. About the struggles of life we go through and the pain and scars it leaves behind but still we go forward to reach what is ahead.

Never give up always keep your dreams alive, for when we quit dreaming we quit living!!

Thank-You............as it is it shall stay i suppose.......Ive written it and rewritten it many times over the past couple of years.

Sometimes the words should be left alone when the meaning is so deep it reaches out to others in its own way. What you may not see as perfect hits closer to home then you have any idea to others.

YOUR FLASHLIGHT, will nevr be without yo, nor your heart withstanding yor eyes to see and feel. Just face it Ice.......YOUR GOOD ,,,damm it,wink,lol
KEEP up your thoughts of tomorrow, and keep THESE words coming on here,wink..
Love ya girl...