Topic: HELP Me PLEASE
AutumnLee21's photo
Tue 03/06/07 10:02 PM
I am a single mom of a 2 month old, I have a year off of work for mat
leave i dont go back untill next dec 22nd. I love my daughter with all
my heart but i am going through a rough patch with her, she is a awesome
baby but whenever I put her down she freaks out.. As soon as i pick her
up she smiles and coo's at me. i cant even go to the bathroom or do
dishes without her losing it. and when i say crying i mean death like
screams.. i took her to the docs she is 100% healthy and as soon as i
pick her up she is fine so i know there isnt ne thing wrong with her.
Someone told me to let her cry but she will cry for hours to the point
where her face goes purple and she throws up over n over again,. and i
cant just let her cry like that i feel soooo bad. And Is it normal for a
2month old to already be playing strange? Mystery <-- my daughter is
alwways with me cuz i dont trust ne one with my baby cept my mom. When
ppl come over and hold her she cries as soon as i take her back she is
fine and smiles. She is around alot of ppl but doesnt like it when they
hold her. as soon as she sees me she cries i take her back she smiles
and coo's? is there anything i can do about my delima? I want to do the
best i can do and raise mystery to the best of my ability

LAMom's photo
Tue 03/06/07 10:11 PM
My Son was colic and he cried alot,,, So I went out and bought a
Baby Papasan ™ infant seat. It plays 8 soothing songs and vibrations
helped relax him. It's very soft and it always calmed him,,, As he got
to be about 4-5 months I then went out and bought him a Baby swing...
Every where i went through the house he could see me and hear me,,, It
made my life alittle easier,,, Good luck Sweetie,,,

AutumnLee21's photo
Tue 03/06/07 10:15 PM

Thank you LA mom i will def have to try that anything that will work
will save me a head full of my hair LOL

LAMom's photo
Tue 03/06/07 10:18 PM
Your Welcome,, The movement and music the seat makes seems to work all
the time....Your doing good Sweetie,,, Hang in thier...

WakeboardingGuy's photo
Tue 03/06/07 10:52 PM
Dude, I hate to be the bad guy, but a bad upbringing can (will)
permanently warp a human being. I think further professional help is
the way to go. Not an internet dating site. I'm not a parent, but this
doesn't sound like it should be taken lightly. This is a place where I
would come for advice on how to cook my eggs or remove a stain from my
shirt

mcdchaz's photo
Tue 03/06/07 11:04 PM
LET her cry but monitor her so she knows u care

Qnfhrts's photo
Tue 03/06/07 11:06 PM
I read tons of books when I was pregnant with my daughter 6 years ago.
Believe it or not a child/infant can start to manipulate at a very
early, and I mean early age. If she is dry,feed and in clean bedding,
then you need to let her sooth herself. Let her know that you are close
by, once she has stop crying you can talk with her play with her while
she is lying down without picking her up. She will eventually get the
hint that sceaming and crying will not give her her way.
I know its very hard to hear any child cry,especially your own, no one
said parenting would be easy and feeling guilty is only one part of our
job (being parents) You will thank yourself for starting this at an
early age....you will reap the rewards later, I have.

AutumnLee21's photo
Wed 03/07/07 06:10 AM
Hey WakeboardingGuy just for ur info i am not a bad parent thanks and
she is not going to get a bad upbringing thank you very much. And I have
asked professionals for advice and such everyone has a diff way of doing
it and I was just seeing if anyone out here had a way to help. Thanks
for bein an ass I am not on a dating site to get ppl tp raise my dughter
i came on here to aska ? didnt know that was a crime sorry. i guess
that makes me a bad parent and untill you have a child of your own and
you know what it is like bein a single parent than come n talk to me.
Its not like i am asking for medical advice for my daughter holy ppl are
quick to judge another thanks for bein the one to judge me hope it made
u feel better.

TxsGal3333's photo
Wed 03/07/07 08:36 AM
Autumn you said she was 2months old if it is not colic which if it was
she would stil cry even if you were holding her. Don't know if you have
started feeding her or not but when mine was 6 weeks old started giving
them baby ceral only about 2 tablespoons at a time my daughter did have
colic and within 2weeks she quit all the crying and was happy as a lark
she just was not getting satisfied from the milk. But if not that then
get a walker or swing you can put them in and wind it up keep a radio on
in there room for the noise. With the walker or swing you can put them
in there and that way they will be close to you. AS far as the letting
them just cry till they shut up naw they are having like withdrawls and
need you close give them that love while you can but slowly and surely
if you leave the room and she crys just come back in hold her for a min
reasure her your not going anywhere do this over a few times she will
relize you will come back get her toys that has a big mirror that way
she sees her self and thinks someone is in the room with her, keep one
on my kids crib they would lay there and coo to themselves.
flowerforyou get toys that will catch her attention. bigsmile

TxsGal3333's photo
Wed 03/07/07 08:37 AM
Ohh and ignore guys that have no clue what raising a kid is all ahout.
bigsmile noway noway noway noway noway

AutumnLee21's photo
Wed 03/07/07 11:01 AM
Thanks alot TxsGal, that is really good advice i will have to try
everything you said. I went and bought her alot of baby toys that play
music and such but i find she gets really bored with them, but she
doesnt have one with a mirrior on it. i will def go out and pick one up
see if that works. thank again :) Being a first time mom can be rough at
times i am just getting used to her diff cries so thats a plus
lol:smile: :smile:

horseracer's photo
Wed 03/07/07 11:24 AM
Well autumnL I think you have a little girl that needs you're warmth and
love and a baby only knows that feeling by being held. I say hold her
and love on her often.not only when she cries but when you put her to
sleep when you think she'll be geting up soon pick her up, let her wake
up in you're arms holding her. because in my opinion you can never hold
you'r baby to much. she just want's to feel secure and thats the only
way a baby feels security is by being held.I personaly raised 4
childern. and one was a girl and she required more attention. as all
girls do happy flowerforyou good luck

horseracer's photo
Wed 03/07/07 11:29 AM
pss: the more attention you give her now the less she will require
later.and dont go to work tell you are comfotable with leaving her. and
leave her only with you're parents

FlyersSteph1212's photo
Wed 03/07/07 01:10 PM
Hey Autumn! I'm not a parent myself but I am a nanny of a 19 month old
with a heart condition. She has the same issue with her mom. It took
her forever to get used to me being there! The trick that works with
her is putting on classical music to soothe her and when your daughter
is older you can try to put on more upbeat music and dance with
her....gives you both a great workout!

TxsGal3333's photo
Wed 03/07/07 01:23 PM
Horseracer and Flyers are so very right you can never give them too much
love. Girl my kids sleep with me till ohhh Gawd who knows how long and
we are very close. I did not care what others said we all know how it is
to wake up alone hello they have those feelings too. Now my kids are
grown and well adjusted and happy they show there love and respect
others. My son is in no way considered a sissy lol far from it. Funny
have had his girlfriends tell me he talks about his mommy and the things
I have done for him. There is no greater joy than to have a child love
you. To this day when my granddaughter that is 4 comes to stay with me
she sleeps with me you know there is no greater feeling but to wake up
and she has her arm around your neck looking you in the face saying
Ganny I love you so much!!bigsmile bigsmile :heart: bigsmile
bigsmile

AutumnLee21's photo
Wed 03/07/07 02:45 PM
I agree with you Txsgal, I like to bring my lil one on the couch with me
and cuddle with her, we both dose off for our afternoon cat nap lol.
there is no greater feeling than your child wanting only you i love it
lol.. When ppl hold her and she screams untill i take her back. makes
you feel like at least u are doing something rite lol. When you have ur
first baby they should come with a manual at birth LOLlaugh laugh

BigGlenn's photo
Wed 03/07/07 02:55 PM
Duct tape. laugh just kidding.

TxsGal3333's photo
Wed 03/07/07 03:03 PM
Gawd girl they have manuels problem is I think the ones that write them
either don't have kids or really lived a life being deprieved of love.
What you do is read what others say for they don't all work for others
then make your own pattern of raising them yourself. You will do fine
for it is well shown that you care and love her that is the best gift
you can give a child.

Ohh talking about the way she does when others pick her up funny cause
my daughter was the same way. If it was me, her dad, her brother or
grandmother now it was okay but ohhhh my gawd was in a store one time
she just a little over a year old and now is 22 a man in line behind me
at the grocey store acted like he was fixing to pick her up you could
hear that scream all through the store embassesed the hell out of the
older man for he just thought she was cute had no bad intentions but
ohhh did she scream had to pick her up and hold her she would not let
anyone pick her up she was not around all the time. Now my son hell he
liked talking to everyone hummm regular ladies man shssssssssssssh lol
So just know it is normal for her behavior. Just love them while they
are little before you know it you are looking up to them wanting them to
put there arms around you again lolbigsmile flowerforyou

TxsGal3333's photo
Wed 03/07/07 03:04 PM
Sure BigGlen who gets the Duct Tape your boys tape u up often huhhh
lmaolaugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh

rarerose's photo
Sun 03/11/07 07:50 PM
I may not be a mother but I am a nanny and I know what you’re going
through. The best thing to do is to let her cry, as gut wrenching and
annoying as it can be, it is best. She doesn’t have to be out of sight
or forgotten but put her in a rocking seat while you do the dishes and
talk to her and rock her with your foot, that way she knows she’s being
heard and not ignored but will also learn that attention doesn’t have to
come with being held. It’s very easy for children to get spoiled even if
it just holding them too much. When relatives come over even don’t allow
her to be held too much or she will forget everything you have been
working so hard to fix. I know shes young but you could also turn the tv
on to a kids show...they like the moving images and colors as well as
you could play soothing music. Just be patient and eventually everything
will be fine. Best of luck.