Topic: Bit of a rant, bit of a question.....
no photo
Tue 05/27/08 12:12 PM
if you have enough money for him to buy a motorcycle.....give it to him....as a gift not a loan.....you can gift 10k (it might be more now?).....and take the write off on your taxes....

otherwise....don't do it.....


msskarly's photo
Tue 05/27/08 12:13 PM
Oh i just admire you! You have been through so much so you can definitely handle this! Saying NO to your father is always going to be hard but you have helped him enough! Sometimes people need to help themselves! Just bc you say no to him does not make you a bad daughter! flowerforyou

no photo
Tue 05/27/08 12:18 PM
Thank you all for your comments. I just needed to see if anyone else thought this to be wrong.

lilith401's photo
Tue 05/27/08 12:34 PM
It is not only wrong, he is trying to change the dynamics of the parent child relationship!!!

Is he an addict?

no photo
Tue 05/27/08 12:36 PM

It is not only wrong, he is trying to change the dynamics of the parent child relationship!!!

Is he an addict?


Not anymore. Neither is my mother. I am glad they got clean.

lilith401's photo
Tue 05/27/08 12:39 PM
Nooo, the answer is YES. He is just not using. Once an addict, always an addict.

I am happy they stopped using. flowerforyou

no photo
Tue 05/27/08 12:58 PM
Good, I feel like I owe him because he gave me life, but at sometime you have to let your parents stand on their own feet.

lilith401's photo
Tue 05/27/08 01:01 PM
Exactly... this dynamic should not come up until they are much older and unable to care for themselves. You need to show tough love and firm boundaries.

(((((HUGS))))

RoamingOrator's photo
Tue 05/27/08 01:07 PM
I think the question you have to ask yourself is this: Do I want to buy my Dad a motorcycle? You know he's not going to make payments (or at least not all of them, or on time), so do you have the desire and finacial ability to foot the whole bill for this bike? Or would you be willing to reposess the bike yourself? Do you want a motorcycle? Are you willing to say to your Dad in the future: "you deadbeat, I'm taking this thing"?

Fade2Black's photo
Tue 05/27/08 01:08 PM

Okay, my dad is a low life, I realize that. I bailed him out of jail twice. He had his house foreclosed upon, and now he wants me to cosign for a motorcycle. WTF?



How do you say NO in a 100 different languages .. separate out the finances from your love for him. Period. No way.

no photo
Tue 05/27/08 01:09 PM

I think the question you have to ask yourself is this: Do I want to buy my Dad a motorcycle? You know he's not going to make payments (or at least not all of them, or on time), so do you have the desire and finacial ability to foot the whole bill for this bike? Or would you be willing to reposess the bike yourself? Do you want a motorcycle? Are you willing to say to your Dad in the future: "you deadbeat, I'm taking this thing"?



No I need to buy me a knew car, my tranny is going out and I am going through a divorce and really need to focus on me. I really wish he hadn't asked.

lilith401's photo
Tue 05/27/08 01:10 PM
Don't let him guilt you into it. Just say, HEY!! That's your job. I'm not feeling guilty. I didn't pack any bags and I'm not taking a guilt trip over it! laugh

no photo
Tue 05/27/08 01:15 PM
laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh

Don't let him guilt you into it. Just say, HEY!! That's your job. I'm not feeling guilty. I didn't pack any bags and I'm not taking a guilt trip over it! laugh

naturalstyle's photo
Tue 05/27/08 01:21 PM
It seems that some people don't want the responsibilty of being an adult. It seems that with certain it's cooler to be a liability and a crutch. I work to feed my own mouth. They should do the same.

longhairbiker's photo
Tue 05/27/08 01:29 PM
I will take a big mac, order of fries, and a 2008 harley davidson FXDBB street bob in vivid black. Can I get an order of foreward controls and mini saddlebags with that?

no photo
Tue 05/27/08 01:30 PM
I'll do it laugh laugh laugh laugh

no photo
Tue 05/27/08 01:30 PM

Okay, my dad is a low life, I realize that. I bailed him out of jail twice. He had his house foreclosed upon, and now he wants me to cosign for a motorcycle. WTF?



Don't do it. You sound as if you are an "enabler." That is a person who helps another continue destructive ways. It was okay to bail him out of jail once, but you should not have done it the second time.

I sense you are continually helping him and you need to go the tough love route --- do not help him anymore. Let him sort out his own mistakes and do not co-sign for a motorcycle. He might hurt/kill someone with it and that would make you once again an "enabler," if this happens.

longhairbiker's photo
Tue 05/27/08 01:31 PM
Uh no.

MirrorMirror's photo
Tue 05/27/08 01:32 PM
smokin I cant stand my dad anymoresmokin

longhairbiker's photo
Tue 05/27/08 01:34 PM
I want one of everything when it comes to motorcycles.