I quit college, married at 18, and spent the next 19 years being a good military wife, mother, etc...without daring to think about what I wanted. Now at 38 I'm single again, in a big mess financially, have grown and almost grown kids, am alone and not exactly having to fight men off, in a dead end job and still not done with my secondary degree, and trying to figure out where I go from here.

I cannot imagine, however, losing 14 years of my life and memories...are you scared that the point that you're waiting for already came and you lost it? I'm hoping there are points along the way that we get some idea if we're heading in the right direction so we can redirect if not...and you did an amazing thing for the child you stepped in for...you can't help it the mom couldn't see how lucky they were. I hope you're still able to have some involvement...?