if He really does everything for a reason... why take someone so early...?

ive lost 5 people now in the last year... from old friends that drifted away a little, to a friend ive known for 16 years...

one of my buddies took his life today... i talked to him just a week ago... he seemed good.. great.. he had everything, so it sounded, working for him... a job he seemed to like.. graduation just a month away.. and hopes and plans for college... so what makes someone take their own life..?

how does life become so hard that it seems the only option...? how can someone really think that there is no hope left...? so young, so full of potential with life waiting to begin.. right around the corner from growing up...

i hate hearing "things happen for a reason"... its supposed to be that way with breaking up with a girlfriend or your goldfish dying... not a person, a friend. a good kid...

i dont know what to think anymore.. only 20 and i feel like ive already lost so much, so many friends gone.. never again will i see their faces.. only in my head, and in the few pictures left to remember them by...

why does it have to end like this for some people...?

Why are you blaming "GOD" ?

i dont know if i really am.. im not even really religious... its just that everyone ive talked to, friends of ours, have brought it into play...

all ive heard is "He has a plan.." and all the other common cliches about death and God and everything...

maybe all the cliches are wrong

i just wish there was more i could have done... more anyone could have done...

God, Moses & Jesus all said the same thing, We are God's we know good from evil, we make our own choices. Cause and effect, people die that's no big mystery, if they take their own life than that's their choice. That's what life is;choice.
We choose our own paths, disease effects all things not just humans, everything dies. Do I feel remorse for a mouse that lost a brother, or a fish who lost a child? No, because it happens to everything and everybody.
Thing is, if you take your own life, that's just a flat out selfish thing to do, throw a rock in a pond, the ripple hits all sides. People love to look into the sky and scream "why!" at some faceless being, be a god go look in the mirror and ask the same thing. Cause and effect, the ripples touch all sides, the smallest thing you could do, inspires greater things.
Yeah, five people in a year has to be rough, 5 in a day would be worse and I'm only saying that cause I seen a pregnant dog get run over.
Ask yourself, "What kind of God am I, do i make a differance or do I not realize the power I have?"

I returned from Iraq Dec 16, 2007. On January 28, 2008 I, seriously, attempted to take my own life. When I returned from Iraq all my friends had moved to other posts or gotten out of the military. I went stir crazy in my apartment. Anyway, there were other issues too. The pain inside that it becomes unbearable and you just want to go " home ". Your friend may have seemed alright because he was content with his plans, yet inside wishing there was another way to ease the pain. My prayers go out to him, his family and to you. We just don't think about the pain we will cause others because we are in such deep pain ourselves. Keep in touch with your friends, stay in tune with others feelings and watch for signals. Do some research. You may be surprised that more of your friends are depressed. There IS help out there! Be a friend and force them to get it or call the right people. Don't worry about your friend being mad at you. JUST DO IT!!

Depression is a mentall illness that requires professional help. There was nothing more that you could have done.
I am sorry for your loss

I lost four people in February. One of them was my cousin's 25 year old son. He took his own life.

We are left here to keep their memory alive.

An example of being a God

((((((((((( Tslengquist)))))))))))))))


Last week, My friend had everything going for him....promotion...ate healthily....seemed happy...now he is gone

Tslengquist...

I can feel your sorrow and grief over the loss of your friend .
I can sooooo relate...



I am Trusting God to Comfort You and Be with You Also ,Tslengguist....in This Time of Sorrow and Loss Over Your Friend

Although I Do Not Understand Why
Still .....Will I Trust in God.

thank you so much

im sorry for your loss as well, youll be in my prayers as well as the family and friends who lost so much

Sorry to hear of your loss.

Was it your friends will to take his life or Gods will that he takes his life?

I don't know the answer to that only God and your friend knows the answer.

I believe and trust in God. I believe that we are all here to do Gods will. to serve him and our fellow man/woman.

Maybe God needed your friends services elsewhere.

Hope that helps.

Maybe there are no reasons--perhaps it is something that can be attributed to a diety "somewhere" but these are questions that are asked and asked and asked again--and rarely answered. And that is not glib. I am sorry for your loss and I am sorry that you've lost so much in such a short period of time.

When I lost my dad 13 years ago (I'm 36 now) I asked a lot of questions. Why? Why did a man who gave his whole life to defense of this nation pass away one year after retirement? But no answers came then and none have since.

I stopped looking to God not because I blamed God but because I figured there wasn't much point in blaming what was not there. I'm not angry--not a bitter individual. I am at times cynical and I am aware of that, but I would not spend a lot of time looking to the sky. It might help and perhaps it will help you--but if it does not, just honor their memeories by remembering the best of times with them--and try to remember the gift that was; knowing them.

My best,
Drew

thanks guys and gals... i really appreciate the support

I think this is only a problem if you view God as an interactive personified deity who can intervene at whim.

Then you become baffled as to why he never intervenes.

As soon as you drop that notion of an intervening personified Godhead, and recognize that God isn’t like that at all. Then things make much more sense.

There’s also no need to become an atheist to do that. The pantheistic picture of God is completely compatible with a God that doesn’t intervene. And once you fully understand how that picture works it makes perfect sense why God doesn’t need to intervene. No one ever really dies. They just move on to a different spiritual level.

In fact, if people who believe in an intervening God truly believed that when people die they go to heaven to be with God then they wouldn’t have nearly the problem with death that the seem to have. They would jump up and down with joy when a loved one dies.

The problem is that they genuinely don’t trust their God to be fair, merciful and loving.

If they did, they’d know that God would never allow anyone to fall into the pits of hell over pettiness or mere depression (a disease that God himself created!)

At the very least, if you’re going to truly believe in a judgmental intervening God, then do so!

Anytime someone dies young, or takes their own life, you have to know that an all-loving compassionate God would be sure to take care of such people. To believe that he would fail them and allow them to fall from his ‘grace’ would only imply that he has no ‘grace’ in the first place.

All you really need to know is that God is more compassionate than you!

If you don’t believe that, they you must have a pretty low opinion of God.

So why feel sorry for anyone who dies????

Clearly if they went to hell they deserved it otherwise God would be less compassionate than you to have allowed that to happen!

And if they didn’t deserve to go to hell then surely a God who is more compassionate than you would not permit that to happen.

So all you really need to do is toss all the doctrines and myths in the trash can and realize that if God exists he/she/it must necessarily be more compassionate than you!

Anything less would be a pathetically pitiful God.

tslengquist,

I'm sorry for your loss. Losing someone close to you can be a terrible experiance and makes many question God's existance and God's love. Unfortunately, there is little anyone outside of yourself can do for you in this time. My best wishes go out to you and your family.

Many will disagree with what I am about to post.

God isn't in control of everything. At least not in the way most people think. God can take control of any situation at any time, but most of the time God allows events to unfold as his creations dictate. So the actions of humans, animals and demons effect our lives.

If you pay attention to the Bible, you see that God rarely interacts with humans directly. God would tell one human or group of humans what he wanted them to do and it was their choice if they did it or not. It's still that way, but the orders came from Jesus and can be found in the Gospels.

It is sometimes hard for me to understand why people would kill themselves. For some people, dieing is easier than living. Living is the biggest challenge of all I think. It takes great courage to face our fears and responsibilities.

I am so sorry for your loss and for your grief. In times like these, very little can be done or said. If I were there in front of you, I would hug you and cry with you.

(((((((tslengquist))))))))



JB

if people would change the question word from "why" to "what for" I'm sure people would have a different perspective of life.
We are always looking for a reason when we need to be looking for a purpose.

You never know when someone will go. You have to ask them and yourself if they have a relationship with the Lord. If you don't have one, I'd encourage you to start one today. Feel free to e-mail me if you want advice on how to do this.

Two things I did when I was depressed and thinking about ending it all before I started walking with the Lord years after:

1. I got some counseling and kept going until it helped. One time I went and the counselor didn't keep a follow up appointment so I kept suffering. The next time I went, a few years later, I went to a follow up and it helped.

2. I ate bagels. For some strange reason, eating a bagel seems to cheer me up. Try it. You might like it. But, caution, this kind of thing can make some people take off like a rocket!

Growing up in a Christian home/church, I heard "why" often and the follow up, "God must have a plan." I heard it until I hated it. Now, I tend to ask myself, "why not?" If, we, as Christians choose to follow Christ and turn our lives over to Him, why do we think we should be above all the hurt, sorrow, tears, anger, wrongdoings that are a part of life? Why ask why? Bad things will happen to us as surely as they will happen to everyone...it's a part of the freewill that humankind was given at creation. How easy and how many more Christian people would there be here on earth if we magically suffered nothing upon our baptism? So, I ask why not? Why not me, why not us? It doesn't make the pain go away, but it does bring a little more perspective, at least for me. The great thing is, I have a Friend, a God, a Comforter, a Guide, Counselor, Father, who will listen and share my ups and downs like no one else is able. He is my Hope, my Strength, my All and in Him I can rest, recouperate and heal from anything this temporary life has to offer up. And I do believe God can use any evil that happens here on earth to further His kingdom; I just don't believe He causes that evil.