i know from experience that DSS don't play tho...........at least the a$$hole$ and bytches in sc don't.......hell they make up allegations.........

what kid of medication do yall take?

they havent put me on meds yet.

well i have been thru this before.It will be fine but it just pisses me off because Brandon doesn't fully understand the ramifications of what he has done.He just knows if he says something stupid,mom gets in trouble.Its more aggravating then anything.

zoloft and klonopin when having a panic attack.

I am going to be gone for a few days, having surgery. Hopefully be out of the hospital on Sunday.
You all have a great rest of the week and weekend.
Take care and be happy.
(Some people will do anything for a vacation - I get
2 weeks of work!!!)

cipralex 20mg
seroquel 800 mg a day
zolpidem 10mg
lorasapm 4mg a day
valium 5mg


and others for physical problems to, pain meds.

Sorry to hear you having such a rough go of it, Allen. Too bad you can't get a job like I have. I am so busy taking care of others that I don't even time to worry about my own problems any more. The actual pay sucks but overtime is really easy to get because everybody besides me has an actual life to go home to. Sure the nurses and aides all have husbands or boyfriends but I have made some real male friends because of it. I hope you get a break, Allen. Man the fringe benefits are really something working where I do. It has really helped to work at the home. I would recommend it to anyone going through depression. I have all kinds of women calling me now. Not one of them has anything to do with dating. Usually someone needs a ride or they want to let me tell the home that they won't be coming in so as they don't have to deal with the nurse. Even the nurses ask me to call aides because my phone list is better than theirs. The 30 year aide I was training had a humdinger of an excuse. She said she accidently left her cell phone in her boyfriend's truck. The boyfriend gave the phone back to her the next day and told her oh by the way work called you yesterday. She said her boyfriend was a mechanic and might come help me with my van. I am building the network of friends through husbands and boyfriends. It is awesome. And some of these aides are awesome cooks and cook so there is plenty extra. Yeah, it sucks to get behind on bills. I am going to have some tough times ahead because I have spent money on wants when I should have spent it on needs.

hi roy, how are you??

Having a good morning after one hell of a night at work. Made sure to close the curtains on one resident who has seizures. I have learned that seizures and lightning doesn't mix too well. We have so much rain and storms here. It is like the windows of heaven have opened up and just won't quit. How you doing, Debbie?

ive been in hospital 3 weeks, on a phyciatric ward. i came out monday, im still not well, i saw my pyciatrist this morning and hes given me valium and lorazepam and im seeing him in a weeks time for another script, he might increase the valium, im not sure at this stage.

I bet you are glad to get out. I hope the medication helps you. There is no place like home even if one has to be alone. One of our residents was able to atleast bring her bed to the home. I hope you don't get any bad reactions and you get medication that helps you. We had one resident who when they diagnosd him found out that the side effects of the medication were actually the same as the symptoms of his dementia. I hope you get the right stuff and get the generic equivalent so it doesn't cost you too much.

im glad im out roy, its been sad in there.

one women smashed a plate and started cutting her wrists in front of everyone, others were throwing chairs and swearing at staff, loads of people ran off and had to be restrained. its been very noisy, a few patients would scream and swear all day. im glad to be back home, its heartbreaking in there.

It gives one a real appreciation for the outside world. Outside being away from the place. We just got one back from the psyche ward where I work. I had to watch him last night and separate him from the female he went to the psych ward over. As usual we wee short-handed so I had to access the situation in order to figure out how to separate the two. I knew he liked coffee. You don't give the sundowners caffiene. I got a cup of decaf coffee and took it to his room and told him it was there. He followed the coffee and she came wheeling by his room starting to go in there. I told him I was shutting his door so she couldn't get in there. He smiled at me and said thank you. She is a sweet old lady just lonely and wanted someone to talk to. That someone wasn't him for sure. She wheeled by his door and an incident was diverted. One demented resident is bad enough but you don't want two together because they can clash.

i was getting very instertulised in there and i was only there for 3 weeks, im glad they didnt put me back in there today as i would have got instertunlised even more, and its hard enough now.i dont want going there to be my safety net, i need to find my own ways, and only as a last resort go in. its been a big shock coming out into the real world for the 1st time in 3 weeks.

i know ive spelt that big word totally wrong

I know the word very well; "Institutionalized" because I got that way myself once. Fifteen minutes away from the place by myself and I would get panic attacks. I could go away with another person to the outside meetings and was okay but not by myself. This was back in 1984 and I hadn't been off drugs and alcohol for very long. I hadn't been divorced that long, either. I had also been hitch hiking for a long time. I was addicted to hitch hiking and found out it was called a geographical cure. It was how I was able to deal with problems while under the influence of drugs and alcohol. I simply just didn't deal with them. Out of sight and out of mind was the fix for my problems. That and self-medicating blocked problems from my mind. But it was a real kind of existance and not what I would really call living. I really didn't know how to deal with the simplest of problems without being stoned out of my mind. Enough drugs and the problem ceased to exist until I came off of them. I first tried workaholism to fix the problem but being stoned seemed to fix the problem for a longer period of time. Right before I went through the anxiety attack one lady who was sitting on the front porch with me thought I was going to come out of my skin. I was trying real hard to astrally project. Just three years ago when my wife passed away I went through something similiar. I found that grief and coming off drugs to very similiar in nature atleast for me. It is like home or the sense of home has a dynamic effect on a human being.

thanks for the correct spelling

yes after just 3 weeks i felt institutionalized, in the whole 3 weeks i didnt go outside once, they didnt give me hours out or anything, it was a big shock coming back to the real world, im so glad they didnt re-admit me today because i would have got more and more institutionalized. with me i felt better in hospital because there were people, nurses doctors around all the time, and i felt safe.ive figured now i just dont feel safe unless im surrounded by lots of people, and that wont happen. did you have that roy?? you felt better in hospital around others??

wow. i'm glad that when i went in for an evaluation they felt i was stable enough to be relased into my dad's custody. i dont think i could handle being inside for that whole time, not to mention i'm a smoker, and just the 12 hours i was there for drove me off the wall with out a smoke. and the nicotine patches they gave me wasnt enough. I dont know i have my frist theapry session next week. and i'm scared!

Okay you guys, i'm only doing this as a favor to my stepmom ...................she has a whole series of health but this one thing is bothering her badly.....it started about 5 years ago (why she is just bringing this up now i have NO friggin clue.......but she stays cold.......i don't mean from the house being cold, either.........as of right this second my dad and i are sweating like crazy, but my stepmom is clutching a heating pad and is covered in blankets to keep warm.....not to mention it is over 80 degrees in the house......she's had just about everthing but cancer.....does anyone have any idea as what could be going on with her?????????

Yes, Debbie during those times and still to an extant I feel better in a group setting. It certainly has gotten better because during the time I felt I needed a keeper as I didn't trust myself. I noticed that last major trip I took when it didn't work out I almost resorted to old behavior. It was like no home behind me; No home where I presently was so home must be ahead of me. It was a search for home. Home became being around people I was relatively comfortable around. Somehow I changed being from a loner to a groupie. It was like my crutch was gone and there was no stability. Being around people brought me back to a sense of purpose; A new reason for living and a feeling of being needed. Home simply became the collective and when that happened a 180 change occured because I lost the want to be a nonconformist and felt the need to be a conformist. I found I liked being a member of something. It made more sense and for the first time I felt a part of like I belong. I wasn't an outcast any more and I lost my grip on being totally unique for there were others out there just like me. It made me happy and I loved the serenity of it. It was like I rejoined the human race. I quit fighting the establishment because I was part of the establishment and discovered I had been fighting myself. No wonder I was suicidal. Eventually I became a productive member of society and it was like the human race opened it arms and received me back into the fold. Yup, I am a groupie.