Why do women have small feet?
So they can stand closer to the sink.

Why do wives wear white?
So all the applainces in the kitchen match.

How do you fix a woman's watch?
>You don't. There is a clock on the oven.

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be open when she brings it to me.

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me."

Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to
build up the required pressure.

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the
front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.

Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.

Women will never be equal to men until they can
walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
gut, and still think they are sexy.


In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested



I'm a pig, But I'm a nice pig.oink oink

Yes you are a pig...but a very funny pig indeed!!

Too funny!!! Cro-Magnon thinking, but funny!!!

problem with woman....oh my..but cute