John was a clerk in a small drugstore but he was not much of a salesman. He could never find the item the customer wanted. Bob, the owner, had had about enough and warned John that the next sale he missed would be his last! Just then, a man came in coughing and asked John for their best cough syrup. Remembering Bob's warning,he sold the man a box of Ex-lax and told him to take all of it at once. The customer did as John said and then walked outside and leaned against a lamp post. Bob had seen the whole thing and came over to ask John what had transpired. "He wanted something for his cough but I couldn't find the cough syrup so I substituted Ex-lax and told him to take it all at once.", John explained. "Ex-lax won't cure a cough!" Bob shouted angrily! "Oh, yes it will!",John replied,"Look at him......he's AFRAID to cough!"

The Pillsbury doughboy is way too happy.....considering that he has no genitals! When something is "new and improved", which is it?....If it's new, then there has never been anything like it before and if it's an improvement, then there must have been something wrong with it before! People who will get off their ass to search the room for the tv remote because they're too lazy to get up and change the channel manually! When people say, "It's always in the last place you look!" Of course it is! Why would you continue to look for it after you've found it? Do people do this? Who are these idiots? People who point at their wrist when asking for the time! I know where my watch is----where is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?

While walking down the street one day, a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St Peter. "Welcome to heaven" says St Peter,"but it seems we have a problem...we seldom see a high official here and we're not sure what to do with you! My orders from higher up are to let you spend 1 day in hell and 1 day in heaven and let you choose where you wwant to spend eternity." He is escorted to the elevator which goes down, down,down, to hell. The doors open to a green golf course and standing in front of the clubhouse are all his friends and other politicians. They are happy to see him, shake hands and reminisce about the good times while getting rich at taxpayers expense. After a game of golf,lobster,caviar,and champagne, it's time to go. Up, up, up and the door opens to St Peter,waiting to show him heaven....contented souls, moving from cloud to cloud,playing the harp and singing. St Peter asks for his decision...."Heaven is nice, but...." So he's escorted to the elevator and down, down down, he goes. The door opens to a barren,waste land covered with garbage and all his friends dressed in rags, picking up garbage as it falls from above. "What Happened?" he asks the devil who smiles and replys,"Yesterday, we were campaigning.......today you voted."

I'm told that a number od southern states have recently passed laws prohibiting people from Minnesota from relocating to their states. It seems they have concerns about anyone who would be STUPID enough to live in this god-forsaken, frozen, tundra!!!!

EXCELLENT! good humor....

pic is fine......pay no heed to the Neanderthals!

Ahh, now ya see how deceiving looks can be....you can get one too...look in the MENS' clothing for a nylon windbreaker with a hood....

Hi, everyone....I'm new to this site and am wondering about the multiple profiles by seemingly same persons (same pic--different locations).....fakes?....put up by who?