[big][red]HAPPY BIRTHDAY!![/red][/big]

DOH, try this again.

Since somebody beat me to it, I'll go for more flamboyant.

Hello, folks:

I don't expect too many confessions in this thread, but I have to
ask.

I'm new to the online scene. I want to know if online woman lie about their age as they do on the bar scene.

My (oh so sincere) hope is that the online venues draw a different kind of crowd.

Anyone care to share their experience?

Thanks.

You forgot the big one:

So, who is the father?

Similarly:

But, honey, everyone does this mail order DNA test these days.

Pre-coitus: I'll be on the couch watching...anything.

All of that fit in there?

Not now Spot, I have a special friend over. OH, sorry, in this light...

That reminds, me, I need to call my mother.

Is the Oxyclean guy your brother?

Did they ever?

One of the big Greek philosophers (Herodotus?) went on a written tirade centuries ago decrying their manners, their hair, everything.

I say let kids be kids.

Need anyone say more?

I'm just chiming in with my "what they said, man".

Cut and run. The false premise here is that a negative relationship is better than no relationship.

You are her safety net. But who is yours?

Cut and run.

Hmmm, this post reads like a bad rock song, don't it?

Guys in general have problems with closure.

The dehumanizing seeming anonymity of the net amplifies this behavior.

Close the text book and read the cover: Some guys are just jerks.

Dude, you already have the open mind. It can work. Society will be agin ya, an you already know that.

The way I see it, you are more than halfway to having a good time.

My advice:

Don't talk about your high score on any console game system.

Don't feign interest/knowledge in a topic you THINK a 40 year old hottie would be interested in.

Revel in the experience of sharing what you DON'T have in common.

Avoid babysitting references of any kind. Although I can imagine some side splitting hilarity in this area.

Finally, and hopefully unnecessary, leave the lettermen jacket at home.

Go forth and make ye joy!

Race car, or cartoon sheets?

Maybe not, but it was funny as heck!

Seriously, the OP was not offended, why should you be on his behalf? Some food for thought...

Not all negativity is meant to be negative. Sometimes it is just darn funny.

OK, teaching suit on. ;)

From the early days of the Internet there was usenet. People talked just like we do here on this board today. When two or more people get into a verbal pissing contest, it was and still is, called a flame war. So, when someone says flame suit on, or /flame suit it means they are going to say something that they know might be taken the wrong way, or is prone to inciting discord. Even this explanation can be seen as condescending although it is not meant to be.

Moving on. My point was, and still is, do not underrate the father's role.

I am sorry you had/have a crappy dad. Forgive and move on when you are ready. Remember, forgiveness is not about legitimizing their conduct, it is about acceptance and growth within yourself.

I am a former Marine, so I may in time forgive your poor choice for service to our country. ;)

My question is what the heck are you going to do with that flower all night?

How about a carnation, or if it must be a rose get one that you can button/pin to something to keep it out of the way.

If you enjoyed the first date, SEND flowers the next day.

How about SEND a single rose and time it to arrive while she is getting ready. Well, not bath towel with green goop on face ready, but you get the idea. Don't forget the card that reads something like "This little beauty teased my eye in preparation for the greater beauty that will be on my arm tonight". If you are not the sloppy romantic type go with humor: "If you enjoy tonight use me for pot pouri tomorrow; if not the refuse container will smell better than the memory".

Eh, cut me some slack, I made those up on the spot. Good luck, FTD stock holder.

It seems to me that the real question is can YOU handle it?

Twenty years ago I met this great gal in college. We were very compatible, spent time together nearly everyday. She clearly wanted more. She had this forehead thing that I couldn't get over, though. I simply wasn't sexually attracted. It took a while to sink in, but I finally realized that I couldn't keep her hopes up. We sat down and had a heart to heart and I never saw her again after that semester. No, I didn't actually tell her it was the forehead thing.

Yes, it was shallow; maybe even cruel. But I couldn't get over it. Period.

So, can YOU get over it? Best wishes to you!

Flame suit on.

Did momma teach you to be a man?

Husbands may be overrated, but fathers are underrated.

I was raised by a single mom myself, but isn't the whole child rearing thing much easier with two parents around? That's my point, pure and simple. I'm not knocking single moms.

I darn sure am NOT saying single parents need to run out and find a mom/dad ASAP.

Single parents have to steel themselves against a fast paced uncaring world any way they can. But the children do not know how to do so.

OK, enough cold water, you can go back to husband bashing.

But isn't that still their home?

Yes, I'm new, and I'm sure it is a term of art. BUT WHERE THE HECK ELSE DO KIDS LIVE?? Home is by definition where you live!

Wouldn't it be easier to say "Yes, They live with me"

I've been reading this for a while now and even though the concept is clear, the literal redundancy is maddening.

Ok. I'm done. Thanks for listening.

Both of you could use some time on the leather couch. You feel overwhelmed and unsupported by their FATHER of all people.
He feels, you took my kids away to be Super Mom, and Super Mom does not have a sidekick. It is still about you and him, not the kids. Co-parenting kids is more about eating crow and drinking crap than getting Johnny to baseball and attending P/T conferences.

Granted, I don't know you from a #2 pencil, and have one paragraph upon which to spout off about. However, the patterns are so incredibly common that contemporary books on divorce take them for granted.

Yes, I'm very direct, and some may even say rude, but I do wish you well.

Ok, you posted while I was composing my last. It looks like you got things well in hand. Good Luck, and remember there are those of us who are in your corner that you will never meet.

There is one step worse, in my book. The mother of my children has changed her mind about the custody arrangement. She wants them back because of the money that would come with them. She admitted it in front of me and both of our lawyers.

I'm not trying to shift focus, just add some perspective.

The whole situation Royally Sux, no doubt about it.

HMontana is quite right: work for consistency in the visits.

Offer to pay for the activity during the visit. I don't remember where I heard/read this, but it may be a valid option. Those hotels with the indoor water park are ideal 'safe' visiting places. There is space to be apart, space to be together, ever present activities for kids and adults; an all around win.

Enough woman were offering emotional support. I thought I'd do the guy thing and offer support and a solution! Ok, Ok, I know, unnecessary gender stereotyping, even after quoting the comely Hmontana. Finding humor in all things is the key to coping, IMO.

There is a term close to what you are feeling: compassion burnout. It is very tough for action oriented men to continually support a sub-optimal situation. The stress is real. The feelings are valid. This little bit of venting may be all you need to cope, but don't be afraid to seek further assistance.

My take is that men 30 and up want/need to taste the milk before buying the cow. I'm assuming, of course, that we are talking about a euphemism for waiting to have sex.

Women who are on their second, or more, start that are born again virgins suggests some sort of defect. I'm not saying it is right, or wrong, I'm just pointing out what I've seen.

Now, if you really mean nice as in 'nice' then hell yea men want nice girls in the beginning, but there better be a confident woman under there, too.

If your 8th date goes go like this, then you are not nice, you are meek to a fault. Woman up if this applies.

Him: What would like to do tonight?
Her: Whatever you want. I really enjoyed that evening at __ four dates ago.
Him: Well, let's do something you like, I'm running out of ideas.
Her: Maybe we can post a message to this board I'm on for ideas.

Just remember this is Internet message board advice and may very well be worth what you paid. :) Please, don't take it personal. I may be a bit acerbic, but I do mean well.

I hope you find Prince Charming-but-not-too-charming-because-thats-too-much-pressure.